I used to think that if I told the real truth, the whole world would burst into flames. Nine years ago it felt like it did. It makes me remember and feel...
...like telling some people what I know that I pretend not to know so they could be just as shocked at the betrayal of others as I was at theirs.
...extraordinary shame when I catch myself wishing that bad things would happen to bad people. It's not up to me to mete out punishment.
...pity at discovering, though years have passed, sometimes people remain in the same emotional place in their lives forever.
...sorrow that, although I would love to put some things behind me and forget about them altogether, one cannot have an elective lobotomy. I tend to worry circumstance like a loose tooth.
...lost. I need an emotional and spiritual GPS.
...hopeful when I am reminded of kindness that came out of nowhere.
...grateful for the love in my life.