Walkin' around on those (whad'ya call 'em?) oh - feeeeeet...

When I tell people I worked for Disney in Orlando for almost two years between high school and college, they always ask what ride I worked on or which character I was. I tell them that I was Ariel in the "Voyage of the Little Mermaid." In the dark. Under black lights. And they always look skeptical. I understand; it's one of the park's most popular attractions (or it was at the time, in 1992 or 1993). I do what I always do in the face of skepticism: Bust out in a top-of-the-lungs stage singing voice: "Look at this stuff, isn't it neat? Wouldn't you think my collection's complete? Wouldn't you think I'm the girl, the girl who has everything?"

And so on, and so on. By the time I get to: "I wanna be where the people are, I wanna see, wanna see 'em dancin'...Walkin' around on those (whad'ya call 'em?) oh - feeeeeeet. Flippin' your fins you don't get too far, legs are required for jumpin', dancin'...Strollin' along down a (what's that word again?) streeeeeeeeet" they usually believe me. If there's still any doubt, I offer to act it out with the choreography. Or add a bit from the reprise ("Watch and you'll see, some day I'll be, part of your worrrrrrrrllllllld...").

Maybe they think I'm more of an Ursula than an Ariel? I would have happily played the sea witch, however her part was played by a giant puppet. Most of the other characters were either puppets or film clip animation. How else can I explain why I can't remember my own home phone number, but the lyrics for Part of Your World have taken up permanent residence in my brain? It is also possible that people are skeptical because I'm such a deadpan liar.

I once worked for Disney. Whether or not I did so in a mermaid costume is open for debate. I hate to blow the persona I've spent years creating (angry rock chick) by admitting to another (cheesy Disney character), so let's just focus on what's really important here: In the end, they all lived happily ever after.