Worry makes a big shadow...

I wish I was one of those people who worried about giant things that are hard to wrap your mind around, like world peace and global warming and how much longer low rise pants are going to be in fashion so I'll never have to look at the ass cracks of total strangers again. But I'm not. My worries are random and irrational. Currently:

*My mother was sick for the third time in three months and I worry that she has cancer but is keeping it from me. Now I'm also worried that she'll get cancer because I just said that.

*Michael is going on a trip to Montana and I worry that he will fall into a crevasse.

*I worry that I've gotten so used to living alone I won't be able to live with anyone else ever again.

*I worry that I won't be able to find a date in time for my friend's wedding in April.

*I worry that someone has stolen my identity and is ruining my credit, even though I pulled my credit report two months ago.

*I worry that my biological clock will finally kick in...when I'm 40. I hope it doesn't, but I worry that it will.

*I worry that I will accidentally say what I am thinking out loud.

It's crazy-making, all of this anxiety over nothing. Like a dog with a bone, I can't help myself. I gnaw, then gnaw some more. I'm tired and cranky and peevish that I'm the only one who can give me a push when I need it, or celebrate when I'm finished, or be happy that I'm home when the day is done. And now I shall gnaw on that for a while.