On the job hunt front....

I've been awfully lax about keeping this site updated, but I have a good excuse: I've been working for almost a month at a new day job! For those of you who know me well and who have been keeping up with my (often amusing) tales during my job search, you know how great this news is for me. And I am happy to report that I love the new job. I'm online content editor for a high-tech company here in Austin, I get to work with a great group of creative people (I hadn't realized how much I've missed working with designers and art directors and having magazines like HOW scattered about), I have a regular schedule and also get to have weekends like normal people.

It took a few weeks to settle into the routine, the putting on of makeup and clothes that don't have stretch waistbands, shoes that aren't flip-flops and doing something to my hair other than putting it up in a ponytail. I miss my dog while I'm at work, but she's thrilled to see me every day when I get home so it all evens out. I also do not love the sitting in traffic, but I love the job so that evens out too (plus it gives me lots of time to listen to my favorite podcasts; time passes quickly when you're catching up on episodes of "This American Life").

And (AND!) I have some great stories about the job search. I had been freelancing since Sept./Oct. of last year so I could take my time and look for the right job for me and went on lots of interviews in an eight-month time period. I was talking to a friend last weekend about Karma and arrogance and hubris and how I often felt like I was being punished for something (pride, lack of compassion, taking pride in my lack of compassion) when I was working my way up the ladder. I believe we can learn a lot from the Universe if we just pay attention and it didn't take me long to start paying attention. In fact, I felt like I had a couple of interviews with the person I used to be - and I didn't like her very much.

I've learned to be grateful. I've learned humility. I've learned how to let go of the past. Most importantly, I've learned that I'll never stop learning. I plan to spend more time here, more time writing, getting back to personal narrative (because my mind is usually itching to after spending a full workday editing high-tech web pages) and to let my job be a job, not my identity.

Speaking of letting a job be a job, I've promised my friend and fellow writer Angie Mizzell a guest post and I'm hoping she hasn't crossed me off of her list yet, as I have a post in mind about that very topic.

Love you, mean it.

Luck and getting what you need when you need it...

My niece Keri gave me this when I was still living in Charleston. It's for luck and prosperity, two things I need right now (the latter more than the former), and it hangs in my Austin home in the kitchen window.

It's the lucky charm I see while washing dishes or cooking and today it reminded me that we get what we need when we need it. I'm working hard balancing my time freelancing with my job search, hoping that the right job will come along, hoping that the Universe knows what it's doing, and hoping that I'm making the right decisions.

Everything leads to something and I know the time I've put into my job search, into my freelance work, into surviving on a daily basis, will lead me in the right direction. It brought me here, to Austin, for a reason. I started writing about luck this month because I caught myself wondering if I believed in all of these talismans I surround myself with, but realized they're just stand-ins for what everyone else calls faith. Reminders. Everyone has to believe in something, to have faith in something. I'm letting the Universe steer this ship. The lucky charms are just there to remind me to relinquish control. Every time I have, I've gotten exactly what I needed.

Vacation, all I never wanted...

I've never been great about taking vacations, especially as a freelancer when every hour is a potentially billable one. Over the past year - actually since moving to Austin in early 2010 - work-life balance has been one of my priorities.

This holiday weekend, I'm not headed on a jaunt to the islands, to a cabin in the mountains, or on my dream Alaskan cruise (whale-watching!), but I am disconnecting from work and work-related marketing tasks for the weekend. I have a great stack of books to read, my air conditioning works really well, I plan on taking lots of naps (had a good one this afternoon, falling asleep on the couch with a book open on my chest), getting some things in my house in order, re-organizing my home office space, maybe doing some housekeeping on my own personal sites (not really work-related, but I know that one is a stretch), taking the dog to a dog park for some running around and ball-throwing, and sleeping until my furbaby wakes me up instead of the alarm.

Right now, this is the vacation I need: taking my brain to a new creative space, writing for personal gratification instead of professional gain, taking my body outside for some people-watching and dog-bonding, exploring a few parts of the city I haven't seen yet (yes, I've been here a while but there's lots to see in Austin), and reading for pleasure instead of research.

I might even break out the Moleskine and colored pens and do some actual handwriting (can't remember the last time I went there, but my Moleskine dated pages says it's been too long). And I'm charging my camera now in case I feel like wandering around and snapping a few pictures of this crazy city in which I live, maybe find some interesting things off the beaten path, strike up some conversations with strangers, re-set my internal clock. It's not the Caribbean, but it's what I need now - and bonus: it's all here in a 10-mile radius.

I hope you're getting out - of town or in - and doing some exciting things this holiday weekend. And I haven't forgotten why we have a three-day weekend and plan on including some thoughts on gratitude and respect for the brave people who have sacrificed so much to make our country a better place (you can't see it, but I'm waving a tiny American flag right now). For those of you spending the weekend with your families, be grateful. I'm thinking about mine far away right now after having a marathon phone conversation tonight with my older sister, who I know will have the family over for a barbecue on Monday and I'm going to miss out on the chaos and laughter.

Love you, mean it.

I surrender...

I admit it, I give in. This day has completely kicked my ass.

Started off with a way-too-early doctor's appointment (note to self: don't schedule during drive-time traffic). Also, I discovered I am running slightly low on clean clothes about the same time I was getting dressed to leave, so ended up wearing a Depeche Mode t-shirt from high school with a sweater thrown over it.

Back home with a loooong to-do list, I figured I'd throw a load of clothes in while I worked. Sounded good, but after I moved them from washer to dryer, it started getting really warm in the kitchen area. I had to pull out and crawl up and over and behind the dryer for the THIRD time in a year to re-attach the hose to the dryer (you know, so the outflow will go outside instead of turning my laundry room into a steam room). My laundry room is just about large enough for a washer, dryer, and some shelving, so contortions were required. I think I pulled something.

I remembered to eat lunch (leftover Chinese food), but it was awful. Good for dinner last night, terrible reheated. Add that to the list of why I hate microwaves.

As a freelancer, I find it really difficult to turn down any projects (a good freelancer really shouldn't), unless it's something that violates my personal ethics. What happens as a result is that your days run into other days with things called "sleep breaks" in between and you no longer have time to do laundry, shop for groceries, make hair appointments, get a pedicure (summer's just about here!), and those things that you used to call "weekends" are just extra work days.

I'm a terrible person to complain about ANYTHING. Seriously. I have work that pays my bills, a mostly flexible schedule, and I get to hang out with my dog all day wearing yoga pants and a tank top.

But today? I'm allowing it. Just one day that kicked my butt, I'm offline for the evening, planning on actually cooking some food for dinner, watching mindless TV (Glee!) and that should be enough to regroup and start fresh in the morning. There's a light at the end of the tunnel and its name is "Balance." Also: "Day Job." Still looking.

One of the nicest compliments I've ever received...

Wasn't when my 27-year-old stylist assumed "we were the same age" (and this was just last year).
Wasn't when my dermatologist told me I had "fabulous" skin (yes, he frequently used the word "fabulous" and said this during a full-body skin cancer check).
Wasn't when a good friend of many years sent me a birthday package addressed to "Kelly Love Johnson, Rock Star."
Wasn't when I got a "fan email" recently - two years after my book came out - from a lovely 25-year-old woman who told me that my book gave her the courage to ask her boss for a raise after 3 years on the job - and she got it.

I've been on a lot of job interviews in the past few months because I'm searching for the perfect day job (something I can be passionate about, challenged by, creatively stimulated, etc.). I'm interviewing the interviewer as much as they're interviewing me (because of all of the above, I wouldn't accept a job if I didn't think it would be my perfect day job). In one of these interviews, the woman conducting the interview told me she Googled me (good for her!) and found this blog. I don't hide my blog...it's actually on my LinkedIn profile...but I'm always a little nervous when someone I meet for the first time brings it up (as in "oh crap, have I dropped the f-bomb recently? Did I say I hate pork and her family owns a pig farm? Do I talk too much about watching TV? Does she think I'm totally neurotic?").

Anyhoochie, what she said (and I'm paraphrasing) is that she spent a good bit of time perusing my archives here, found them amusing, but what impressed her the most is that I (a) never trashed my then current day job and (b) when I talked about work, even in a funny way, I kept it professional. In other words, I walk the line. I'm honest, but not so honest I'd get Dooced. I was really flattered, but I had to be honest: I've never had a day job that didn't encourage me to be creative, be myself, and when I have been in situations (hello politics) that require me to keep my mouth shut, I'm smart enough to do it.

After our interview, I really started thinking about it. I've had bad days at work. I've written about them, but not in such a way that disparaged my employer (my bad days at work had everything to do with me and nothing to do with them anyway). I've had jobs go wrong, but I had the sense to make a graceful exit and not use this site to bitch about it. And other than cancer, death, and 3rd degree burns, everything is funny - EVENTUALLY. So yes, I've been in bad work situations. I've had to leave jobs with a broken heart. I've had bad bosses. I've found myself curled up on the living room rug in a fetal position, sobbing into my dog's fur. But I didn't write about it at the time. Because it wasn't funny at the time.

It is now. I talk to a friend and former co-worker occasionally about a shared boss's craziness (this is from YEARS ago so don't get all bajiggity thinking I'm referring to you) and we giggle our asses off. Would I write about those stories here? Probably not. Maybe at some point. I don't know. I've gone a little soft as I've gotten older and I no longer enjoy hurting people's feelings. But it's funny now. It wasn't funny when it was happening and I had to step out of the office, get in my car, make sure the windows were up, and scream my head off. The stories are too damn good to keep hidden away forever and ever, so I'm writing them down - as personal narrative that I may or may not include in my second book.

BACK to my point: I've been blogging here for more than 7 years and through 3 or 4 day jobs. And the fact that someone noticed that I can write, maintain a sense of humor, not whine about my job, and protect my then employer's privacy all at the same time was nice to hear. I didn't end up taking the job, but I took the compliment.

Update from Austin...

I've been in Austin 2 weeks today, so I figured it was time for an update!

It was a lot of work (with help from friends and family, who I owe big time) packing and getting utilities turned off in Charleston and on in Austin, opening a new bank account (I had SC Federal), and getting ready for a really long drive. I have to say (and they're not paying me for this), using UNITS Storage and Moving was the best decision I made. They have amazing customer service, my UNIT was delivered exactly when they said it would be, shipped to San Antonio over the holidays, and the driver from San Antonio actually called me when they left for Austin to give me a heads up on their arrival time. And I did a lot of calling around to similar companies (like PODS) and the quote from UNITS was well under the rest.

On travel: I drove to Austin in my Honday CR-V with a sedated cat in a crate in the back seat and my Pomeranian, Lulu, in the passenger seat next to me. I left on Sunday the 2rd and drove for two and a half days, stayed two nights in Interstate hotels (the first night in Tuscaloosa, AL, and the second in a tiny town called Buffalo in TX). The whole drive was about 21 hours and there was a freak cold front in the deep south. Snow flurries the entire drive through Mississippi that didn't let up until Louisana, having to make frequent stops because of the dog (who was surprisingly patient and well-behaved the entire trip), not being able to find pet-friendly hotels before dark (I hate to drive long distances at night).

But I made it to Austin and so did my furniture. I'm still unpacking because I jumped into work pretty quickly and am now going into the office every day (which is weird after working from home for over a year, but it made me realize how much I missed having a place to go every day and working with other people). I love what I'm working on, even when it's a little stressful.

I get flashes of homesickness from time to time, but am keeping busy and it's exciting to be in a new place and explore a new city. The freakish cold weather has subsided, the sun actually came out this week, and I'm sleeping through the night again.

More soon...and lots of love from Austin!

You're fired!

I'm quoted in an article in this week's Charleston City Paper (photo & all...you know how much I love having my picture taken). It's a good piece and I think a lot of people will identify with some of the stories, especially if you're one of the hundreds of thousands who show up for work every day wondering if today is the day you're going to get laid off. Also, I'm thrilled they mentioned my book!

Read the whole thing and see photos here.

Various and sundry unsolicited advice...

Keeping up with my blog here has been difficult lately, as every good idea I've had for a blog post has turned into an idea for a personal essay or story pitch. And since I'm freelancing now and I don't pay myself for writing here, I haven't been as microfamously prolific as I thought I would be working from home again. I've been getting so much advice lately from people who tell me that the media is dying and I should consider (a) teaching (not small children, not this girl!), (b) pharmaceutical sales rep (I'm an editor, not a salesperson), (c) get my MBA (in this economy, really?), and (d) accountant for tax season (if you really know me, you know I don't balance my own checkbook and the one time I did my own taxes, I got audited). With all of this well-intentioned advice coming in my direction, I thought I'd offer some advice of my own.

My newest family member, Lulu (or Lou), is almost four months old. My advice to anyone with a new puppy: Training works. You don't think it will, the puppy will drive you crazy, you'll start to worry that you're a bad dog mom or that you picked the demented (or demonically possessed one) from the litter, but one day they GET IT. Lou finally gets it. I no longer have to chase her around the house for a half an hour before we go for a walk. I don't have to take her outside at 3, 5, and 6am because she's sleeping through the night. She knows potty is for outside only. And (this was the biggest challenge for me) she comes when I call her.

I like working from home again, but I do miss the camaraderie of working in an office. However, since I have so many formerly media-employed-and-now-freelancing friends, all I have to do is send an email or pick up the phone and I can have coffee or lunch with a "co-worker." And then we talk about how much fun it is to work in our pajamas and how much more productive we are working at home. And here's my advice about working from home: No daytime television. Daytime television is the bane of the work-from-home freelancer and it will suck you into a vortex of vapid chicken chat on the View, daytime soaps you've never heard of before, and back-to-back reruns of Law & Order. Naps are OK, but you have to earn them (they're one of the perks of working from home). My rule is No Television Before 6pm.

I also limit checking Facebook to once a day or every other day, try to limit my time on Twitter (still working on that - it's damn addictive!), and restrain myself from going back to bed once I'm out of it in the morning.

This is a time of flux for a lot of us who work in media, but I'm hopeful. And that leads me to my final bit of advice for now: Don't underestimate the power of your friends and support network. I'm so lucky to have people in my life who believe in me even when I lose my confidence and when I'm astoundingly hard on myself. My friends have offered everything over the past few months from a sympathetic ear to a free printer when mine suddenly went on the fritz. I'm hopeful because I'm part of this "we" instead of being out there on my own.

The countdown begins...

The past four-plus months have been completely amazing, insane, wonderful...I can't believe tomorrow is finally Election Day. If you haven't voted absentee (I did that on Friday), PLEASE don't skip it on Tuesday! The lines will be long (I waited almost 3 hours to vote absentee myself) and it may rain, but you're going to want to tell your grandkids that you were part of this historic election.

I've been eating, sleeping, and breathing politics non-stop since early July. My entire life has been on hold. Now I get to start thinking about November 5. I have a list I've been keeping in my little Moleskine notebook called "things to do after Election Day."

In no particular order:
1. Sleep.
2. Sleep through an entire night.
3. Read a book all the way through.
4. Read a magazine all the way through.
5. Express gratitude that my cell phone is not ringing every 20 minutes.
6. Pedicure. Do I need to say that my "summer polish" is still hanging on?
7. See my friends and family.
8. Go one day without reading a newspaper, online or otherwise, or watching CNN.
9. Get home for the day before darkness falls.
10. Find where I stored my winter clothes before it gets too cold.

I'm probably forgetting a lot of things, but these are the ones that have been on my mind a lot. And I miss you all too. I miss being able to talk about what's been going on in my life, with my job, and all of the minutiae I used to go on (and on)about. So here's the notice that I'll be back - soon and before the week is out!

P.S. SC District 01 - Vote Ketner! And (especially my dear friends and family who have been volunteering), please come over to our election watch party Tuesday evening from 8 to midnight - Omar Shrine Auditorium on Patriot's Point in Mt. Pleasant. It's free and open to the public - hope to see you there!

Really just wanted...

...to stop looking at the same sad post from 10 days ago. I'm still working a lot (and will be through the election) and trying to decompress when I'm not. I actually went bowling Saturday night (this will only be funny if you know me well).

I tried to read last night because I've been anxious to start Haruki Murakami's latest, but couldn't concentrate long enough to get through a paragraph. So I plugged in the iPod and listened to new music downloads instead.

I'm not a huge Zach Braff fan (probably because Scrubs went on about a season too long), but I love his taste in music. I like the soundtrack from The Last Kiss more than I liked the movie (esp. Rufus Wainwright) and I just downloaded the soundtrack for season 2 from iTunes and it's dreamy: Old 97s, Rhett Miller, Joshua Radin, The Polyphonic Spree, Colin Hay...

Then I fell asleep during Law & Order. Did the same on Monday night 15 minutes before the end of Heroes (don't tell me what happened!).

Link to the Ketner campaign!

Hi all,

If you're in SC and are a Ketner supporter (and I hope you are), we now have a "link to us" page with codes for your blog, myspace or facebook page, or web site.



If you go here and pick the one you like, all you have to do is copy the code to your sidebar or wherever you want it to show up on your page. Please leave a comment here if you're able to do and let me know! (because I'll love you forever).

Clearly, I am taking a "blog break"

a) I'm working on a campaign and, while I'm loving every minute, there are a lot of minutes. And I won't discuss campaign strategy anyway. Don't have to. Awesome candidate.
b) The lot of minutes thing? Also means I don't have a whole lot to say in my off time because I say a lot in my on time.
c) If I did write about my day, it would not be exciting. (Woke up, drank lots of coffee, went to work for 10 hours, home, eat, sleep). Sometimes I make a phone call or two just to let friends and family know I'm still breathing.
d) I use all my free time to manage the basics of my life, such as buying groceries and tampons, getting a hair cut/color, taking car to car wash. Snooooze. Trust me, my new job is exciting enough to make up for my after-hours boring-ness.
e) I think we all know I was slacking off on posting here before I took this job. I tend to become very reticent when I have a lot of upheaval in my life. And then I wait a year and write all about it.

So if you can stand it that long, I promise to update at least once a week if you promise to keep coming back. And I'll have some better stories to tell in a few months.

Great big steps...

Many of you are already aware, but I've been away from here for a while and thought I'd get the official announcement out of the way so I can go back to my regular navel-gazing and micro-introspection. I've left my job at Skirt as of last week. A lot of people have gotten in touch (and I love you for it) and want to know why. The best way I can explain is to paraphrase from an email from a friend this week: "Little tiny dreams, Kelly Love, require little tiny thoughts and little tiny steps. Great big dreams require great big thoughts and great big steps."

I accomplished so many of my goals while I was at Skirt and I've made a positive decision to move on. I loved my job and I was really good at it, but sometimes that just isn't enough. I'm taking some time right now to figure out what my next move will be, but I am looking forward to what's ahead. My cell number will remain the same, for those of you who have it. My new email address is kellylovejohnson AT mindspring.com. Please feel free to email me there any time!

Why I am not always up in here...

...because, since the redesign of Skirt's web site and relaunch, I also blog on Skirt.com. So when I'm not here being all Microfamously Me, it's usually because I'm writing here. Visit, read, register, comment!

You show me yours and I'll show you mine...

Inspiration, I mean. I'm working on my essay for Skirt's October issue and it's supposed to be about creativity. So for the past week or so, I've been thinking about what inspires me, how it works, what used to inspire me but doesn't any longer, and how I'm going to find my next source. The basic facts:

* I lost my muse a few years ago and that's just not a position you can place an ad to fill. So I've been muse-less.
* Creative inspiration is like a drug. After a while, the same dose doesn't do it for me anymore.
* People ask me how I can write an essay every month and how I managed to write a book in just three months. The answer is easy: I do not have a social life. I knew what I was getting into when I chose what I do for a living. I love what I do, but I also know what I've given up. Long term relationships are few and far between because, really, who would want intimate details of their life put out into the world for public consumption?
* I don't know the answers to (a) where ideas come from, (b) how ideas turn into essays, or (c) how I stay motivated. I work as hard at keeping myself inspired as I do at actually writing about what inspires me.

Here's my latest source of inspiration: Inspiration Boards Flickr Pool.

To all of my creative writer and artist friends out there: What inspires you? Please share. It's an emergency.

I expound at length regarding my lack of trunk junk...

I love my job. Where else would I have the opportunity to offer up 1,000 words on the shortcomings of my ass and get paid for it?

Read it here, or I can sum it up in a sentence: "My ass is defiant and its flatness more powerful than a $36 pair of silicone inserts."

What matters is saying yes...

When people ask me how to get their articles/essays/books published, how they can get a job like mine, how I get my ideas, or how they can write for a living, I never know what to say. I spent a long time not working on my own projects and resenting and being jealous of the creativity of others. A couple of years ago, I read the following quote:

"Do not be critics, you people, I beg you. I was a critic and I wish I could take it all back because it came from a smelly and ignorant place in me and spoke with a voice that was all rage and envy. Do not dismiss a book until you have written one, and do not dismiss a movie until you have made one, and do not dismiss a person until you have met them. It is a f***load of work to be open-minded and generous and understanding and forgiving and accepting, but, Christ, that is what matters. What matters is saying yes."
~Dave Eggers, The Harvard Advocate

Now every time I hear that little voice in my head telling me I can't do something as well as this person or that person, or that it's going to be a long time before I'm the next Joan Didion, I respond with a simple "yes." Forget everyone else and focus on your own. Eggers is right; it is a lot of work. But it's worth it.

Blogging against sexism...

For today's Blog Against Sexism Day, I thought I'd share a little piece-in-progress from my upcoming book (pub date January 2008), which is all about women at work. Fighting sexism in the workplace has been a passion of mine since I got my first job at 15. Now I get to write about it and really make a difference.

Myth: Men make better CEOs.
Fact: Men make more CEOs, but that’s only because people believe fables like “men are more aggressive” or “men are cutthroat.” It’s irresponsible to make broad, sweeping statements like this about either gender. I’ve known women who are more competitive in the business world than any man you’ll ever meet. I’ve seen women walk into boardrooms à la Joan Crawford addressing PepsiCo (“don’t f*ck with me fellas, this ain’t my first time at the rodeo”), bring an out-of-control meeting to attention, close on a merger agreement, and book a flight to another city to meet with employees for a company they just bought—all in the space of 10 minutes.

Women are natural nurturers and problem solvers, no matter how assertive, aggressive and ambitious we are. Every company in the world is about the bottom line; without it, our economy would crash and anarchy would ensue. Companies are getting smarter and beginning to realize that gender diversity is beneficial to their bottom line. Where men fail, women can succeed—and vice versa. Gone are the days of choosing the “right man for the job.” Logically, considering that companies are placing higher value on the cost savings of employee retention and having a compassionate business model, corporate America is waking up to the fact that the right man for the job is often a woman. Regardless, we’re not asking to replace every male CEO with a female. What we do want is an accurate representation of the gender balance in corporate America on the list of CEOs in corporate America.

We don't want more. We just want the same. Every woman has the power to help close the wage gap. We don't even have to march or carry signs. Just ASK for more money, ASK for the promotion, ASK what you can do to earn it, ASK how you can move up that ladder. And if you don't get the answer you want, move on until you find a company who will pay you what you're worth. If we all stand up for ourselves, corporate America will have to find someone else to fetch the coffee and work for 75% of our male counterpart's salaries.

Get updates on my book and more at the Skirt! Books MySpace page. (as if you need another reason to FINALLY get on MySpace!)